Many of you know I crave things. I am consumed with acquiring everything steering towards the ridiculous. I spend endless hours scouring the internet. I have thousands of favorite websites saved and daily updates of new merchandise. Daily Candy and Esty know me on a first name basis. One on my favorite past times is creating Excel spreadsheets about what I like to call my If I were… scenarios. If I were a rich girl….If I were a Mum….If I were to move to London…If I sold this house and bought a new one. It’s totally OCD, ADD and schizo the detail and intensity I pour into my lists. Happiness to me is checking off an item or a task on my lists. When I had a Sony Vaio, crummy piece of shit, I lost a year of my beloved lists, I was more than devastated, I went into panic. Antz could not understand what was so important, “just make new ones that should be fun for you”. How could I explain in between sobs and snot I lost my wedding lists, my places I wanted to travel before I turn 30 list, all my house hunting lists and furniture lists. Am I alone in this obsession of listing my desires, dreams, and goals? I have been planning our world travel plans since 1997. I have our monthly budgets forecast until 2032. My lists have increasingly began to shy away from reality into fantasy. I just chalk it up to being a true Pisces with Aries rising, dreaming in an extremely cataloged and organized way.
I sorta feel like it’s my own way of interviewing myself, like my version of Inside the *Actor’s Studio* Lizzie’s Mind. So here’s an interview of myself:
What is your favorite word? Fuck, whilst & curmudgeon
What is your least favorite word? War, no & dollop
What turns you on? Humor, wit, thoughtfulness, intelligence, bow ties, breads, freckles, spontaneity and my man Antz
What turns you off? Bald guys, abuse, ignorance, feet, being sweaty or cold, cheap tippers and boring people
What sound or noise do you love? Animal yawns, my cat’s sneeze, and ocean waves
What sound or noise do you hate? loud scary sounds (like slamming doors, dogs barking or machinery) loud motorcycles, loud blasting ghetto music in cars
What is your favorite curse word? Cunt, Fuck & Slag
What profession other than your own would you like to attempt? Celebrity Photographer, Actress or European Ambassador
What profession would you not like to do? anything involving customer service, blood, hard labor or military
If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates? You were good, welcome!