I Want it all!!!

That is MY problem. I can’t go half-assed. I can’t give up one thing for another. I have no idea how to balance. I was so proud of myself when I made the difficult decision to forgo our trip to the 2012 London Olympics. I made even more progress paying off a huge portion of our credit card debt and finishing our bathroom DIY. However…I am still itching for a European vacay, and with 2 weddings *one of which I’ll be officiatin’* in a span of 3 months, I’m sure I’ll be using our credit cards again. I am living a ridiculously vicious cycle! I cannot resist spending but now would be the best time to SAVE!! In less than a year we’ll be paying for Liv’s nursery school and if I want my 5 year plan to work, I have to stop the madness!

Of course it’s never that easy.

I seem to exist in chaos…I know our house won’t sell for enough to cover our loan and yet I am wanting to buy a house in Atwater that is well over our budget. I just feel like moving out of a starter house *2 beds/1 bath* and moving into another one is senseless. I need a minimum of 3 beds/2 baths and must have a guest house, preferably with a bathroom and kitchenette. I keep debating if we should buy a place that already has a pool *which thins out what’s available in our ideal area down to 6 homes* or just find the perfect house with a yard large enough to put in a pool down the road *like when Liv graduates college* I found these 2 beauts but notice the hefty price tag. Neither have a pool so lets cheerfully add another $40-$50k on top!

This home is in Silverlake but it has reservoir views and a giant backyard. I also am completely charmed by the Post & Beam architecture and the separate space downstairs. It makes me forgive the realtor for adding the smooth grooves soundtrack to the virtual tour *when will they stop doing that?*

This gorgeous home is in Atwater Village *although not on the street of my choice* but close enough in walking distance of all the action. I am annoyed that the realtor went through all the trouble to create a wonderful slideshow, only to not feature the bedrooms or the backyard, which are more important to me than 15 photos of a water fountain.

As Antz reminds me constantly, I have expensive taste. I am trying to adjust my mindset into finding a great house with good bones that needs love and fixing up but the turn-key houses always appeal to me. I honestly have no idea how those folks on HGTV buy houses and then plunk down another hundred grand in renovations. We make decent money but let’s get real, we have a KID…she will be squeezing us dry well into her 20’s!! This is why I get so pissed when someone asks me why we don’t have more kids. I am terrified I won’t be able to afford this one, living in this house let alone, a new baby, a new house/mortgage, new furniture, more toilet paper, blah, blah, blah!

ARGH!

Point I’m trying to make…I want a new house, BUT I want to travel. I want Liv to go to a very expensive French school, BUT I want to completely renovate and furnish our new house. I want to save money and have no debt, BUT I love to shop and be social. Obviously, I could be practical and focus on whats really important but I HATE not getting my way. I feel like I take one step forward and then two steps back *OH FUCK, now I’m quoting Paula Abdul lyrics*

This rant has officially ended!

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Bonjour, I am a Francophile who enjoys blogging, baking, Björk, peonies, & traveling. Married to 💍Antz & Mummy to Liv 🇫🇷💄🎈🍰🍟🌸

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